K Mom, Here it is.

Because I was told to do a happy one to assure everyone that I wasn't becoming a emo-hippie and was plotting to do evil evil things to everyone around me. Yeah.

So here it is, Jocelyn's Words of Wisdom.

Slurpees are great motivational tools to finish something you don't want to do.
One should never go to 711 at midnight unless in a group of 3 or more, only freaks and weirdos are up at that ungodly hour, (HELLO!).
Your life is not complete until you have seen Sir Ian Macellan river dancing on the late show.
Your life is over when you finally hear that he has come out of the closet, (tear!).
Squirrels apparently make fantastic pancakes.
You know that they English officially hate you when they make you into their food.
Adrenaline is the worst killer of sleep.
Auditions do wonders for one's insomnia... not.
Abstract art becomes even funkier the later the clock gets...
Two-bite scones are only two bites for the first five scones, after that you stop counting.
Ice-gripping eyes are a new phrase that describe my person.
Is the plural for mongoose; mongeese, mongooses, or mongi?
The grey squirrel is the modonna of squirrels (And I am li-ving in a mat-er-ial world and I-'m just a ma-terial.. squirrel!)
And you know it's too late when you are giggleing at a rendition of Ave Maria by Michael Bolton because he has a stain glass windows flying across the screen, for no real reason other than they look churchey (which is my new word as of now, Copyrights, Dibbs, Snakes, Nose Goes! Whatever!) And he's singing but it's from another music video because his mouth totally doesn't sync. Darn You YOUTUBE and you not correctness!!

And now for your moment of zen: "When a M-a-an loves a wo-man, and can't keep his mind on nothing else..."

GOODNIGHT AND GOOD LUCK!

Vents are good.

How can everything I say suddenly make me the bad guy?
I laugh and make a joke. You call me a horrible person. All I said was that it's funny when you get hurt during pillow fights, because it's pillows! They're like battle wounds! Something that you need to be proud of. And suddenly now all I want to do is try to kill people with my pillow, draw blood and be a massively barbaric person... You're a headache.
I try to bond with you through laughing, you hate comedy.
I try to bond with you over food, you hate everything I mention.
I try to help you with your audition, you fight me so much that I feel like I'm pulling teeth.
I can't be constantly soothing your ego and holding your hand every step of the way. Usually when I give someone a compliment I mean it. Don't shoot it down. Doing anything with you is like going to a bad dentist appointment. You wanted to try out, so I helped you so much that I almost didn't have time for my own pieces. I even went so far to get outside help that I had hardly met to come help us. But god forbid you get over your insecurities about cute boys and totally waste the time. Not only did it make you look like the idiot you were afraid to look like but you made me look like one too. I felt uncomfortable for you and then for myself. Here I was meeting someone for the first time really and not only do you make me feel bad, you try and make me look like a jerk because I'm better than you. WELL I DON'T CARE ANY MORE!! I don't care that I can sing better than you! I don't care that I can dance better than you! I don't care if I can act better than you! If you think all of these things on top of your stupid stage freight than maybe you shouldn't be a freaking' theater major!!! There's a thought for ya. OH LORD, You're such a negative person! I can't stand being around you most of the time. I have tried to make that clear, but you don't seem to get the message. We have nothing in common. I'm fed up of you hating the world and being the most negative person I know, but the second I utter anything even close to negative sentence I am horrible and should feel guilty for something that isn't even wrong. You can't fix the world and maybe some of the things in the world can't be fixed because they don't need to be. Not eating meat won't save the animals, because what you won't eat someone else will. Marching and laying down in streets won't bring the troops home any faster. It didn't work in Vietnam, it won't work now. We even just went to a movie that said that and you still don't get it! I think I know what the problem is though. You need to stop wearing your heart on you bloody sleeve. Everything sets you off. But you are so clueless to how people function. I don't blame you for that. I blame you growing up in a ridiculously small town. But I do blame you for thinking that every comment is about you. Not everyone is calling you fat. Not everyone is calling you dumb. People actually say nice things and not everyone is a complete jerk. But you also don't know when to let things go. I have finally gotten over an issue and you drudge it back up. And you keep bringing it back up! Over and Over and Over!! Here we are trying to bury the issue and you keep trying to restart the whole thing. You cry and whine about hating drama, but you're the one trying to keep it alive. But that's not just it!! I say I'm confident about something and you shoot me down. You somehow make me feel guilty about things that I'm good at and that is wrong. That is so wrong. I can't take it anymore. I'm done. I need a break. From You. From college. From drama. From whiny people that are acting worse than some of my Venture kids back home. And they're half your age!! You're College Students For Heavens Sakes! Not children. But I guess the second you're ripped away from your spoiling parents you go looking for your next mom to coddle you. Well it's not me so don't try and make it me. I'm not your mom. I won't hold your hand. This time tomorrow I could honestly care less about your hand because I'm looking out for mine. No one is worried about my hand. And if I don't worry about my own hand, then no one down here will. I've already learned that. No one down here really cares if you actually succeed or not. Oh sure, friends will miss you, teachers will notice you're gone. But after a few weeks they forget and move on to who is actually still here. So, stop. My break starts now. I'm going to shut my door, or not be in my room. I have other Friends. Unsurprisingly it's all of the other older Ra's. But the key word is OLDER. They don't whine, they don't care, they don't gossip, they don't try to make you look like an idiot at all hours of the day. GAH! I wish I had a car. Then I would pile a bag full of clothes and just go home to my family where everything makes sense. I'm loved there and I understand the people I'm with. Here I'm often so stressed beyond belief. And I have finally figured out why. It's not school, it's not boys, it's not my social life. My room mate said that the definition of stress is the 'act of wanting to kill someone or something and restraining from doing so, against better judgement'. And now I know where all of my stress is coming from. It's coming from you and him. Well leave me alone. I left a stressful environment hoping college would be a welcome change and you're not helping. So don't expect me to drag you along anymore. It's not my job to make college work for you. So, you do your thing, or lack there of, and I'll do mine. And then there will be less stress for all.

Gah! I'm so tired.

I thought that I had left it all behind.
The gossiping, the stories, the names, and the drama. But no, It followed me.
People are many things. And now I have seen different sides of everyone.
We've finally hit that halfway point in the first term and the 'Nice-to-meet-you' facade is gone. People's ugly sides are finally coming out. Cat fights are running amok in 2nd floor Green Springs C.
And I'm tired....
I'm tired of you being negative
I'm tired of you being a jerk
I'm tired of you being a know it all when you clearly aren't
I'm tired of you being a down right ass
I'm tired of you being combative
I'm tired of you being always needing to be right
I'm tired of you being more of a woman that I am
I'm tired of you making no effort to compromise
I'm tired of you making me feel like I'm an idiot
I'm tired of you making me so confused

I'm tired of you shooting down all of my ideas

I'm tired of you insulting my opinions

I'm tired of you challegning my beliefs

I'm tired of you reminding me of my weight

I'm tired of you giving me false compliments

I'm tired of you thinking I'm your vent

I'm tired of having always assure you

I'm tired of having to always stroke your ego

I'm tired of having to share everything

I'm tired of feeling sick

I'm tired of feeling like an idiot

I'm tired of feeling liken the oldest person in the room

I'm tired of feeling like I'm the only mature one

I'm tired of feeling like I need to hit something

I'm tired of rolling my eyes

I'm tired of crying

I'm tired of feeling lonely

I'm tired of hearing things about others

I'm tired of hearing things about myself

I'm tired of giving you second chances

I'm tired of trying to bridge gaps

I'm tired of being the only one who hasn't gone home

I'm tired of anyone not really knowing me

I'm tired of no one really caring

I'm tired of not really knowing anyone else

I'm tired of not getting a real hug

I'm tired of not being home

I'm tired of not knowing where everything is

I'm tired of not being able to really have my own space

I'm tired of not being able to be truely alone

I'm tired of not being able to see my sister

I'm tired of not being able to tackle my brother

I'm tired of not being able to hug my mom

I'm tired of not being able to watch football with my dad

I'm tired of not being able to see my grandma smile

I'm tired of not being able to remind my grandpa to turn his ears up

I'm tired of not being able to play with my puppy

I'm tired of not being able to sleep in my own bed

I'm just tired.